And I Shall Never Wake Up That Early Again

by pinkagendist

scarlett_neveragainI had to get up at 8am today. For someone who has insomnia (regularly), that’s a horrible thing. Especially horrible since it was to go to the dentist. I hate the morning light. I hate mornings in general, actually. They remind me of childhood. Having to get up for school. The horrible powerlessness of having no control over one’s life. Sometimes I’d sleep with half of my school uniform on just to get an extra 5 minutes of sleep. The dentist had no other time at such short notice, so I had to take it. He removed my one and only crown and wants to remove my two remaining lower wisdom teeth. He also wants to do something with a laser that’s going to cost a thousand euros. My next appointment is on the 4th (in the afternoon). I’ll let him do what he wants and then probably spend another four years without going. I’m on antibiotics and supposedly not supposed to have tea, coffee or alcohol today. I’m also not supposed to smoke, but I’ve already broken that rule and  had a cigarillo after  a very light lunch of pipérade. I’ve been able to keep to my 3 to 5 cigarillos a day rule without much trouble. When someone offers me a cigarette I still take it, but that’s not a big deal since I don’t leave the house much. Moderation seems a much more pleasant way to live than total abstinence. If I can’t do things I enjoy, what’s the point of being alive anyway?

About these ads